Marked This Day

On this day in 1858, the Postmaster of Boston, Nahum Capen, had 33 mailboxes installed around the city. The idea had been implemented earlier and was improved upon later, so this wasn't especially trailblazing. But it was noteworthy. Too often we forget about the the middle to commemorate the genesis or celebrate the ending. The middle matters too. Mailboxes on street corners might not seem like a big deal to you, with your magic phones and your SnapChats and Insta Stories, and your sub-atomization of water soluble elements that can be sent instantly via aqueous-based 3D printers (may have made that last one up), but I’m willing to bet that Tommy Reilly of Boston 1858 was pretty pumped dere was a mail bowx down on his street cowna. Inventions are always improved upon. Eventually your iPhone 10 that only opens when it scans your face, is gonna look stone-aged compared to the iPhone 20 that will be able to diagnose your health, read your thoughts, and scan your soul. ...

On this day in 1806, Lt. Zebulon Pike first spotted a mountain peak on his expedition into Colorado. This peak, of course, became known as Pike’s Peak. And I’m all for naming things after people, and as far as having something named after you, a peak has got to be up there. I’m also a giant fan of alliteration, so bravo for Pike’s Peak. But it does feel a tad bit lazy to me. I mean the guy’s name was Zebulon. Zebulon. How cool of a name is that? How do you not use that? I get that surnames may be more important, but still. Zebulon! Sounds like the name of an alien overload. Yes the alliteration of Pike’s Peak is great. But come on--Zebulon’s Zenith? Am I right? I guess it’s a moot point, and the important thing is that Zebulon’s efforts were memorialized in a just manner. I still think they (the mountain namers) missed an opportunity though. And if there is one thing you don’t want to miss, it’s an opportunity. So next time one comes your way, whether it’s talking to your crush or...

On this day, in 1959 Jacques Plante of the Canadiens became the first goalie in the NHL to wear a full facemask. During their game against the Rangers, Plante took a puck to the face. Pretty sure that will never feel good, but this one split his lip. Had to go back in locker room to get stitches and when he came back out, he was wearing a white fiberglass mask he had been using in practice. His coach was not happy because, you know, his coach wasn't the one who had pucks flying at his face constantly. But Plante said he wouldn’t play without the mask. He took some grief. Hockey is a macho sport, you know. Checking. Fighting. Sticks. Ice. Pucks. It ain't exactly checkers. So Plante was made fun on. Mocked. Teased. But you know what tends to make you forget about being teased. Physical pain. Plante had broken his nose four times. Broken his jaw. Cheekbones. And needed about 200 stitches in his head. So. Yeah. Good call on the mask, dude. He wore it the rest of his career. And...

On this day in 2013, articles were published around the world about Ukrainian astronomers discovering asteroid 2013 TV135. The asteroid sailed past Earth on September 16th--4.2 million miles away. But it was close enough for the scientists to calculate that there is a 1 in 63,000 chance that asteroid 2013 TV135 will collide with Earth in the year 2032. That’s not an incredibly high chance, (over 99% chance it does not go splat into the world) but it’s still a chance. And it’s a chance based on actual science, instead of Nostradamus or the fact that the Mayan calendar maker got a wee bit lazy after 2012. So it’s a little freaky. Luckily, Michael Bay taught us how to combat it, with the 1998 hit movie Armageddon. Get Bruce Willis and Ben Affleck to drill into that bad boy, and we’re all gravy. Because if any movie director is going to save the world, it’s going to be Michael Bay. Boom! Bang! Explosions!    This Day has Been Marked.

On this day in 1892, Joshua Pusey patented an early version of the matchbook which he eventually sold to the Diamond Match Company (after a bit of a legal battle) and took a position as the company’s patent attorney. The matchbook is not a life-altering, world-changing invention, but you’ve probably used it at some point. That’s pretty nifty. Not many people can say they’ve invented something that a great majority of people have used since its inception. And the truth is we probably don’t know who invented many of the things we do use. Do you know who invented the modern fingernail clipper? Or the shoe horn? Or, shit, who gets credit for toilet paper? There should at least be an Unknown Inventor’s Day, in which we celebrate all of the unknown and underappreciated geniuses whom have made everyday life just a little bit easier. Sure, matches were around before the matchbook, but the book is quite a convenient way to carry them around. And matchbooks allow your local watering hole a c...

On this day in 1969, Bob Dylan returned to his hometown of Hibbing, Minnesota to attend the 10-year reunion of Hibbing High’s Class of 1959. Disregarding for a moment the authenticity behind the legend and lore of whether Robert Allen Zimmerman was an outcast in high school, how freaking cool must it have been to walk back into that joint 10 years later as one of the biggest stars in rock n' roll? Even if he didn’t really enjoy the reunion, even if he felt crowded by people who used to pick on him, or if it brought back bad memories, or if that girl he had a crush didn’t show up, or whatever the case may be--he still had to feel like he was the cock of the walk, yes? No doubt there were probably people holding on to their notions of high school Bob. Calling him Robert. Zim. Zimmy. Mumbling how he still couldn’t catch a football. But a large part of him had to feel like, “get a load of me.”  I’m freaking Bob Dylan. Hanging with Joan Baez, The Band, Johnny Cash. Bob Freaking Dy...

On this day in 1671, Thomas Blood was pinched trying to poach the Crown Jewels of England from London Tower. Captain Blood, as he was known, dressed up as a priest and was able to force his way into the Jewel House. Things went a little south, and Blood flattened the crown with a mallet and tried to run off with it. Didn’t quite work out. Blood and his accomplices were brought in front of Charles II. Now you’d think Charles would be all off with their heads. But Charles was a different kind of cat. He was more like that took some guts son--so I’m gonna restore the lands you lost in the war, and give you an annual pension. Plus Captain Blood became a damn celebrity. I wouldn’t necessarily advocate trying to pull off a high stakes heist by dressing up like a priest, but Captain Blood does demonstrate that fortune favors the bold. Sometimes you just gotta take a risk. Even if it doesn’t work out for you, you might just catch the eye of a King who is dope as bacon, and rewards your audacit...

On this day in 1992, American-Flag-Jacket-Wearing, God-Bless-the-USA-signing, Country Music Superstar, Lee Greenwood married former Miss Tennessee Kimberly Payne. It was his fourth go round with the wedding bells. And why not? Lee Greenwood is a bright, shining star. Only natural that women would be attracted him. That jacket. Those pipes. Patriotism. Yes, he might be a little over the top. And yes, he is really only known for one song. But damn if that isn't one hell of a song. How do you not like "God Bless the USA?" Has to give you at least a tad of pride, if not a mountain of it. Plus marriage is hard, y’all. Especially when you are known for your passionate love of the USA. Hard to compete with that. Perhaps Lee was so proud to be an American that he forgot to be a husband too. Or perhaps his former wives just couldn’t live up to the long shadow that ‘Merica casts. But darn if Lee wouldn’t stop trying. He proudly stood up one more time and gave love one more chance. ...

On this day in 1971, Conrad Van Emde Boas became West Europe’s first professor of sexology at Amsterdam University. Hard to imagine he was the first. Or that it took until 1971 to have an official professor of sexology. Where did people go to get their sex advice? No Dr. Drew. No Dr. Ruth. Did they just go talk their cousin Ralphie, who thought he was experienced in manners of the heart and groin? But Ralphie would probably give you advice like “just ignore her, nothing makes a woman want you more than ignoring her.” Or he’d tell that you’re only job in the bedroom was “to be present.” Or people just didn't get advice at all. Not that I don’t appreciate a perspective from a good cousin Ralphie, but you really can’t beat a 66 year-old professor of sex to get your sex advice. Something about an older person telling you what’s what. And they always use the clinical terms. They speak frankly. It’s a strange dynamic, but it puts you at ease. And sexologists have a bit more of a wide ran...

On this day in 1962, Yogi the bear--not that Yogi--became the first creature ejected at supersonic speed from a B-58. While this seems like the plot of a bad kiddie comedy starring Eddie Murphy after he decided to not be funny anymore or the hair-brained scheme of a circus owner who smoked way too much marijuana, it was actually determined that the female Yogi was the closest thing in weight to human pilot. So they doped her up and strapped her in before shooting her out at a speed faster than sound. She survived, but not without some injuries. I can hear the PETA protesters clamoring already. And I doubt it would ever fly these days. You can’t just go drugging up bears and shooting them out of planes. But hey it was the 60’s. Free Love and Swingers and all that. Protests wouldn’t have done much good anyway. You can't hear protests if you are traveling faster than sound. Of course, if you're bear, you probably wouldn't understand what they were saying anyhow. This Day has b...

On this day in 1983, Donald Davis ran a mile in 6 minutes and 7 seconds. It was a world record at the time. How might that be you ask, especially since Roger Bannister broke the four-minute barrier back in 1954? Well Donald and Roger were running a tad bit differently. Roger was running like a normal person--forward. Donald was not. He was running backward. An odd thing to do perhaps, but he got a world record out of it. Perhaps there was more to it though. Perhaps Donald was making a statement on the inefficiency of moving backward. You can do it. Just not as well as moving forward. If you chose to live your life constantly looking behind you, second guessing the decisions you made, and wondering how you could have made things better, it’s going to slow you down. Sometimes you need to look back. To remember what happened to you--to learn from it. And it can even be beneficial--uses different muscles and helps your balance. But most of the time best way to run is forward. Maybe Donald ...

I hesitate to even write about this. It was a dark time in history, and people don’t like to be reminded of dark times. Why we don’t know much of anything bout the Dark Ages, am I right? People would rather go about their day ignoring the muck and the mire of the past, choosing to remember only the unicorn-pooping-rainbow times of days gone by. They may even hope lightness will shine through the darkness of the present somehow. But this doesn’t just happen on its own. It is only through focusing on the darkness of the past that we can learn to shed the light on that of the present and future. So, unfortunately, I must recall a dark, dark time back in 1992, when on this very day, Right Said Fred’s “I’m Too Sexy” reached number one on the Billboard Charts. I’m all for gimmicks. Being too sexy for your shirt was probably a nice little escape from any actual darkness of the time. And if you were a model the song definitely reminded you to do your little turn on the catwalk. Number 1 though...

On this day in 1970, “Pistol” Pete Maravich scored 69 points in a loss to Alabama setting a single game scoring record that lasted for over 20 years. He only had 22 points at halftime, but then he went to a different gear. They still lost. But no one remembers that. Because greatness can transcend results like wins and losses. It’s a wondrous thing--to be truly great at something. Most of us only get a taste of it--though there are different kinds of greatness. And it seems that those who touch it like Pistol, those that are truly transcendent in what they do, are here only for a moment. Maravich died young and only played pro ball for 10 seasons. But that was long enough to give us some great moments. And I’ve come to believe that life is about moments. Moments that inspire. Moments that teach. Moments that wash the haze of the routine away and make you realize that life is extraordinary and the people in it are capable of amazing things. The odds are you will never spend a significan...

On this day in 1935, canned beer transitioned from the brilliance of idea to reality, when the Gottfried Krueger Brewing Company partnered with the American Can Company to roll out 2,000 cans of beer and cream ale. Look, I understand some people feel beer is better in bottles or mugs, but you know what else is great about beer. Beer. And cans are cheaper than glass. So when these brilliant bastards at Krueger and the American Can got together and decided to put beer in cans, what they were really doing is giving the gift of more beer. A glorious gift. Do you think bartenders are just naturally engaging people? Maybe. But the fact that they give you beer certainly doesn’t hurt matters. Cause you can’t argue with the gift of more beer. In fact, I’ve always wondered why there weren’t four wise men, with the fourth one bring sweet baby Jesus some suds. Or how in any movie/story that centers around a genie, no one asks for unlimited beer? Idiots. Krueger and American Can didn’t figure out ...

On this day in 1957, The Wham-O toy company created the 1st Frisbees. The humble origins of the Frisbee actually go back nearly 80 years prior to the Frisbie Pie Company of Bridgeport, Connecticut which opened in 1871. Kids would toss their empty pie tins to each other and yell Frisbie! Which seems like the right way to enjoy a Frisbee--after eating a pie first. Not that tossing around a Frisbee isn’t a good time for all. And these days people can do some pretty amazing things with a Frisbee. Trick shots. Long throws. There is Ultimate Frisbee. And Frisbee Golf. And it’s all great fun. But I give the Frisbee some extra kudos for its history. Knowing that it comes from pie origins doesn’t make the Frisbee any more or less fun to play with, but damn if I don’t respect the toy just a little more. It’s like falling in love with somebody and then finding out he/she is super rich. It wasn’t the reason you fell in love with that person, but it certainly doesn’t hurt matters. I’m not saying th...

On this day in 1950, The Great Brinks Robbery in Boston was successfully executed by Fats Pino and ten other men. These dudes were dedicated. They started scoping out the armored car depot 18 months prior to find the time when it held the most cash. They stole plans for the alarm system and returned them before anyone knew they were missing. They copied keys. They dressed in uniforms similar to Brinks’ employees, wore masks, hurt no one at the scene, and left little physical evidence. The perfect crime. Except, people are stupid. Fats wasn’t stupid--he informed his crew to not touch any of the $2.7 million in cash, checks, and money orders they made off with that day until the statute of limitations on the crime ran out. And everyone was cool with that. Over 240K waiting for you if you just played it smart. But people are stupid. Like Specs O’Keefe. He left his share with another member while he served a sentence for an unrelated robbery. O’ Keefe started asking for his share and thre...

On this day in 1984, at the ripe young age of 81, Clara Peller first asked, “Where’s the beef?” for a Wendy’s commercial. Insert clichés about never being too old for new experiences. But as I’ve noted before, clichés are used for a reason--they tell the truth. And people place a high premium on the truth. Rightfully so. Because the truth will set you free--whoops, got caught in a Cliché Circle there. In truth, the truth can put you in a bind if you aren’t careful. Like when your best friend, who wants to be a singer, belts out “I Will Always Love You,” and asks for your critique. But it sounded like someone was choking a sick cat. You probably shouldn’t say, “Hey, that sounds like someone choking a sick cat.” Maybe just say, “It’s needs a little work.” The truth needs to be massaged sometimes. Like Clara’s commercial. Wendy’s burgers really weren’t all that different in beef-to-bun ratio than McDonald's or Burger King, but damn if that wasn’t a funny tagline. And there was truth t...

On this day in 1809, Boston put the kibosh on masquerade balls because they promoted free mingling and loose morals. And America in the 19th Century was not all about free mingling and loose morals. More like restricted, segregated mingling and stringent, tight morals. If limited mingling and strict morals are what you’re after then I understand the whole banning of masques. Have you seen Eyes Wide Shut ? I haven't but I'm pretty sure the basic premise was that things get freaky when masks are involved. Look at horror movies. The killer is usually wearing a mask. Not sure if stabbing people was what Boston was worried about back in 1809, but it would probably classify as “loose morals.” The whole current issue with people dressed in clown masks? Masks can make people a bit nutter. That anonymity can make people believe they can do whatever they please. Not to completely bag on masks. That liberation can be a good thing too. I can think of a few people who need a bit of a masque...

Next time you are feeling like you can’t do something, like life is hard, or there are too many obstacles standing in the way of your dreams remember Kitty O’ Neil. Kitty became deaf shortly after her birth. Didn’t stop her. She became a champion diver with Olympic hopes. Until spinal meningitis flared up. On top of that she had two bouts of cancer treatments to deal with. All before she turned 28. No crying. No moping. No woe is me. Instead, Kitty became a Hollywood stunt woman performing for a plethora of hit shows and popular movies. And on this day in 1976 she crushed the land-speed record for female drivers at the Alvord Desert in Oregon. Because people like Kitty O’ Neil are bad-asses. They don’t see problems as things that cannot be overcome. They see obstacles that make them work harder and get better. They live life full speed ahead, only looking in the rearview to see if anybody is gaining on them. This, of course, doesn’t mean that things come easy. Deaf. Spinal meningitis. ...

Most Americans understand how important the day of November 8th is in an election year. Tis when our country decides who shall lead us through the end of the decade. But being as our choices last year were, um, less than desirable, I have chosen to focus on another reason why November 8th is important. You see, on this day in 1789, Elijah Craig 1st distilled Bourbon Whiskey in Woodford County, Kentucky. Of course there are disputes as to whether this was the invention of Bourbon Whiskey or was only recorded as such. In any case, I don’t think I have to espouse the wonderments of bourbon whiskey. In fact, I’m guessing the vast majority of this country may be enjoying the virtues of bourbon whiskey at this very moment. Because bourbon whiskey is a good friend. It will help you celebrate, if say, you are extremely excited at the dunce-cap who was elected President. But Bourbon Whiskey isn’t just there for good times. No fair-weather friend is it. It will also commiserate, say, if you ar...