FEBRUARY 14th - For the Lovers - or - A Good Beheading



On this day in 278A.D. (or there abouts) St. Valentine, a priest in Rome was beheaded by Claudius II. That’s right. The Saint for which Valentine’s Day was named after was executed on the same day that roses and chocolate are barfed all over the place in an increasingly corporate holiday which requires one to demonstrate his/her love and affection for another through material goods. Turned out, Valentine was beheaded because he kept marrying people after Claudius banned marriage in Rome so he could have a stronger army. That’s pretty ballsy stuff by St. V. Going against the Emperor and all that. And then there was supposedly a whole love story with the jailer’s daughter and a letter he left for her before his head and neck were split asunder signed “from your Valentine.” So I get why there is a Valentine’s Day and why it celebrates love. I’m not a love-hater, by any means. I’ve seen The Notebook. I listen to Billie Holiday. I wanted Britney and Justin to make it in the early 2000s. No problem with love here. By all means, celebrate your love with chocolate (makes you hyper) and flowers (they die) and cards (which someone else wrote), just remember that old St. Valentine got his head chopped off so you could be jittery, remember that life is transitory, and steal someone else’s words. Because really, what says love more than a good beheading.

Happy Valentine’s Day!

This Day has been Marked.

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